There is fear and anxiety in the world. These are not just imagined but very much real. Political turmoil, job insecurity, natural disasters, and the separation of families. Whatever is happening in and around you, my heart goes out to you. I want to preface by saying that it's easy for me to speak about managing uncertainty from a position of privilege. I have a job, a roof over my head, and overall stability but regardless I too struggle with a sense of uncertainty and anxiety in my life. How do I deal with things that are out of my control?

Do what you can to help yourself & others

I control what I can and help where I can. If I have more, I try to give a little more. Altruism is choosing to be kind and giving. It doesn't just benefit the receiver but also the giver. Pogosayan PhD states, "It doesn't just feel good, but also does us Good." She cites a Columbia study that suggests helping others navigate stressful situations can enhance our own emotion regulation skills. So, it not just feels good to help others, it can also help us to become better at managing our own emotions. Perhaps that’s another benefit of Group Therapy that you are able to give and receive support and learn through that process.

Be Brave

Sometimes we just need to be brave and face fear and uncertainty. Lately, I have been asking myself this question, “If I were not afraid, what would I do in situation?” If there is no harm and potential good to come from this action, I simply do the action without hesitating. Sometimes, confronting that fear and taking action is the best next step rather than dwelling on if I should or should not do something.

I'm not saying be rash. Acknowledge the challenge, tell yourself it's gonna be okay even if you're not sure. Your efforts matter, and you’re not called to be perfect. Lastly, after I have done all I can or want to do, I give it up (to God) and let it go, especially if there is no point dwelling on it anymore. If you do not believe in God, give it up to the universe or to the trust you have in yourself. Here are two versions of the serenity prayer that embody this sentiment:

My work

Yoojin Nam LMFT is the author of Thinking to Feel. He has been providing psychotherapy for 7 years and is licensed to practice in CA & TX.

Facilitating Online Group Therapy for Men

Wondering if therapy might benefit you? E-mail [email protected] to schedule a free consultation.

Disclaimer: These posts are not a replacement for therapy. The information contained within is for educational purposes only and is not intended to be therapeutic advice.